Salt Leaven and Light

“Fine!” I cried out with overstated fervor.

All alone in the living room, I tossed the book I was reading onto the couch next to me and stood with defiant resolve.

“Fine!” I repeated, my mouth curled into a scowl, “I’ll write down what I want.”

With that, I half hobbled, half stomped my way to my bedroom to retrieve my phone, my left foot throbbing.

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Sears Catalog

I was finally relenting to the impression that had been nagging me for so long—the one that I had been desperately trying to avoid.

Some of my most magical childhood memories center around the Sears Catalog.

With its $4.00 price tag and impressive product index printed on the spine, this 1300+ page of goodness kept me occupied for hours at a time.

Turning the pages, one by one, I would drop my index finger down on every item that I wanted to have in my future home.

My Wishlist

From boxy, pastel-colored 80’s apparel to bold, floral-patterned dinnerware to cream-colored sheepskin seat covers for the car, my wishlist knew no end:

* dusty blue curtains with designer tassel tiebacks
* a newly-designed telephone/answering machine combo
* shimmering crystal chandeliers
* thick-striped neckties for my husband
* Care Bear bedding for our children
* a fast and efficient electric typewriter
* a much-coveted 25″ console TV
* a plush toilet seat cover in light apricot
* a Commadore RAM computer…for only $799

Boy, was it fun to dream!

Turns out, I eventually did end up with many of the items on my Sears Catalog “Wishlist”, though the items came much later, were not necessarily from Sears, and, thankfully, were not exact replicas of the items I had so longed for as a young girl.

Vison Board

Fast forward 15 years to a corporate training where I was encouraged, once again, to dream big, only this time with the use of a vision board.

Cutting images from magazines, I created for myself another idyllic life, complete with physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and financial goals.

I hung my vision board where I could see it every day, hoping that all my dreams for the future would come true.

Once again, they did come true.

I was learning that dreaming pays big dividends.

A Blank Slate

Today, another 15 years has gone by and I find it’s time to dream again.

But this time it’s hard.

Dreaming no longer comes naturally to me.

It’s difficult, I’ve discovered, to dream big when one is filled with fear of the unknown.

My future, a blank slate just waiting to be written on, looks either cold and unwelcoming, or overwhelming and excessively busy, depending on the day.

Emotional Healing

“I need to slow down,” I said to my daughter not long ago. It had been a busy month and I was exhausted.

Within hours of talking with my daughter, I received an injury to my foot that made my wish come true;I was forced to slow down.

These days you’ll likely find me either hobbling to and from the car as I transport my children from one activity to another, or lounging on the couch, my wounded foot elevated high above my heart.

But healing is slow in coming.

It’s been weeks, with little sign of improvement.

Some believe that there are emotional causes for our injuries.

Fear of the Future

According to the book I was reading as I lay on the couch, my foot propped high in the air, foot injuries indicate the inability to step forward in life due to a fear of the future.

I stopped reading for a moment and looked at the wall in front of me.

Fear?

Immobility?

Lack of direction?

Guilty as charged!

As I considered what needed to happen for me to overcome my fears, two things came to mind:

Sears Catalogs and Vision Boards.

Within moments I was overcome with a feeling of nostalgia as I remembered how incredible it can feel to dream.

Commit Your Work To The Lord

Proverbs 16:3 tells us “Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.”

One commentary on that verse explains,

“The first verb, commit, is a word that, in Hebrew, literally means “to roll.” … The idea is that we completely give something over to God in dependence upon Him…The Hebrew syntax also reveals the idea that we commit our work to the Lord in order that our plans will be established. We must do the first part if we expect God to fulfill the second part.”

It occurred to me–“How can God give me what I want if He is unsure of what that is?“

Suddenly, I knew what I had to do.

Wishlist Questions

I wasn’t happy about it, and I knew that it wouldn’t be an easy thing to accomplish, but I made my way back to the couch, phone in hand, and prepared to make another “wishlist”.

Asking myself the following questions, I entered the answers into an app on my phone:

• What does your idyllic future look like?
• With what type of people would you like to associate?
• What memories would you like to make?
• What accomplishments would you like to achieve?
• What difficulties would you like to overcome?
• What would you like to learn?
• How would you like to spend your time?

Ready to Roll

With my wishlist finally complete, I am ready to “roll” it to the Lord, trusting that my dreams for the future will one day be “established”, for He, more than anyone else, has the power to make dreams come true, be they in Sears Catalogs, on Vision Boards, or in an Android phone app.

“Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh.” (Matthew 7: 7-8).

What dreams do you have for the future?

Are you ready to “roll” them to God?

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